SMALL TALK

Mathew, Christopher (2004) “Seven Secrets to small talk” MSN.COM, August 16, p.1

In a society of strangers, the art of being able to do small talk is a real art or science. It is a way to get through a public part of your life. In spite of all the people that you may see, most you will not know. Alas, this is the list to help you get through some awkward moments. Perhaps, you may enjoy yourself throughout it all. They are:

1. START WITH BASICS you have to begin some very basic stuff like “do you live around here?” You gather non-controversial information about the other person.
2. ASK OPEN QUESTIONS make those first questions so general that an individual who is very private can get out of the conversation. It takes 2 to small talk.
3. FIND COMMON GROUND try to search for areas of interest. Avoid talking about sex, politics, and religion.
4. TAKE AN INTEREST if an area emerges that both seem to enjoy, run with it.
5. EYE CONTACT this one can be tough for males. However, eye contact means that you are interested. Females use this to bond. Males struggle because eye contact can mean sex or violence to the other person. In a real tough bar, you don’t look at other males.
6. BE YOURSELF well this one is tough too. You do not reveal all of yourself, but you may find that as you relax that you can be more comfortable with yourself in the presence of the other person.
7. LISTEN pick up on clues that the other person is discussing. Then return them in the conversation. Your most enchanted listener is yourself.

 

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